Since I came to DA, one of its many touts was that you could make good friends easily there. Students and alumni alike told horror stories along the lines of "it took me six months to even talk long with anybody" or "I connected with someone and then they blew me off the next day," begrudging the States (can you recognize a theme here?) for its shallow relationships. Yet three years into and 99% done with my stay in Dakar, I can honestly say that this, DA's proudest pander, was not at all the case for me.
I have friends, sure, but no one I'd call a best friend. I am completely different from the guy I hang out with the most, and we frequently wonder how we're friends at all, and then remember that we get on each other's nerves all the time. But even more so in the past few months, I've been kind of upset upon realizing how few meaningful friendships I've made since coming here.
Maybe it's just the After AP/Before Grad personas that many in my class have developed. One of my friends has pretty much gone insane, and he will be the first to tell you that. He has gone from a very responsible Student Body President and Sound Guy to a complete goofball, no longer applying himself academically and being crazy all the time. His math teacher actually asked his dorm parents about his well-being. It's not inherently a bad thing-- the guy had a busy year and needs a break, and I've already stated my opinion on Academic Senioritis-- but it definitely shows one end of the spectrum that my class now lays all over.
I was even further enlightened to this point last night when I caught up with a very good friend over Facebook and eventually Skype. While we used to be super close, I'll admit we haven't really talked in about a year-- even last summer, I only got to see her for a meager few minutes. So I was both thrilled and alarmed to discover how easy it was to talk again. In a lot of ways, it's as if we left 8th grade yesterday. It was an absolute pleasure reconnecting with her.
We had similar feelings towards several of our classmates, she actually answered the question "How's it going?" with more than one syllable, and I didn't have to draw out meaningful conversation like poison from a wound. And it was great to talk to someone who doesn't hate cats. It was amazing, but I wasn't used to it.
I think it's just for the same reason that DA alumni have trouble making friends in the States. I can't connect with people here because they aren't really American just like they can't connect with people in America because they aren't really African. I really didn't think the whole MK thing would be that schismatic of a trait, but here we are, three years later, and I still connect way better with my middle school friends than with the people I've been around for most of high school.
I guess the safest conclusion that can be drawn from this is that my middle school friends are freaking amazing. Cheers, Charter.
-Will
"What do I do when my love is away?
-Does it worry you to be alone?
How do I feel by the end of the day?
-Are you sad because you're on your own?"
